We gotta get through this wall yesterday, folks, and we need to think of some way to do it.
Alright, it looks like ghosts can't phase through it.
Kevin, you look like you've got a plan brewing; let us know. In the meantime, go, Elekid!
You're gonna hang out here and heal. I got enough potions to bring you back to fighting shape, and then we are going to break these foxes' faces. The second we get past this wall--
TOM: How the hell did Frostbite make it through the barrier?!
JESS: Um...because he's a ninja? Duh--
TOM: That information helps none of us!
JIRACHI: My people...protect me as you always have. I cannot hurt them.
Is...is it in my head? It's talking to me in my head?
JIRACHI: You must hurry--!
TOM: Then bring the fucking wall down, legen-dipshit!
JIRACHI: But...you put the wall in place!
Well, shit, that's not good.
Elekid, take another potion while I release Gliscor. We're gonna hit these fuckers so hard, we'll send them back to Jizo--!
But if even Remy's Fissure doesn't provide us with an opening, how the hell can we get through like Frostbite did?!
TOM: How did we bring up the barrier, Jirachi?!
Kevin's pushing as hard as he can against the wall, but nothing's happening. Only Frostbite and these things made it through. Come on guys, anyone got any ideas other than ninja bullshit?
Lapras, get out and get ready! Elekid, one more potion ought to do it! How you feeling now?
TOM: Jirachi, man...come on! Help us help you!
Good idea, Jess; maybe your Houndour can sniff out where in the barrier Frostbite was able to--
The barrier seems to be pulling away from Houndour as he gets closer to it--
KEVIN: Dark-types. Only Dark Pokemon can pass through the barrier.
TOM: Wait...is that why you were pushing against the barrier???
KEVIN: ...
TOM: Don't look at me like that! That was your idea!
It looks as though a sizable opening appears whenever a Dark-type gets near the barrier, so if Jess calls out all of her Pokemon, we might be able to create a big enough hole to pass our Pokemon through! All of her Pokemon except for Shiela, who--
Oh! Oh, okay! Decoy Jirachi then? Didn't even think of that.
JIRACHI: Hurry!
Alright, here we go; when Jess's Pokemon open the barrier, we charge into the breach with everything we've got. Lapras, you pick one out with Ice Shard and then you guys break bricks all over that one's face. Sandshrew, you're still new to the battling game, so curl yourself up and be ready for heavy impact.
Now's our chance; launch the ice through the breach and charge!
Roses, Network, Anubis, Remy and Nightsun have your backs, you guys! Pick 'em off and drive them out--
The Ice Shard hit! Go for it before--
...it knows you're coming.
ZOROARK: The maelstrom is coming...
Three bogeys inbound with massive speed! Brace for impact--!
Gliscor, hang in there, girl! Great dodge, Elekid! Remy's hit, too, but he's taking it like a champ!
JIRACHI: I can aid you, but you must be swift!
ELEKID: This power...thank you.
JIRACHI: Hurry, before--!
The other two foxes just took Jirachi out! Time's running out! Roses is taking care of one; Gliscor, strike now!
Direct hit! That sent it flying back--!
One of the ones that took out Jirachi, it's coming right at us! Look out--!
Brilliant interception, Elekid! I think I heard ribs crack on that shot! One down, four to go!
Anubis is almost within striking range, and those Swords Dances should make short work of anything that crosses his path! Kevin, what happened to Chang and Juanita?
"Running interference"? Works for me! Vigoroth, go for the fox Gliscor hit and bust that thing up--!
Before that other one makes contact--!
Juanita from the underground, followed closely by Chang! Kick-ass interference, Kevin!
There's another one charging Remy--
Dee! Awesome! Keep it pinned against that wall! I'll send help soon!
One's been knocked out, one's pinned to the wall--
And Nightsun just cracked one upside the head with Iron Tail! That one's on the ground, but he's not out yet.
ZOROARK: It's coming...the maelstrom is coming--
NIGHTSUN: I'll fight that, too.
ZOROARK: It is coming--
ELEKID: And you're going.
Another one goes down...a little brutally. Great job, Elekid--
Make that two down! Sneasel's Metal Claw tore through that one like a hot knife through butter! Only two left! Gliscor, finish off the one Dee's got pinned!
That leaves us with one last fox--
And Anubis looks rock hard to hit this thing. Arturo?
ARTURO: Low Sweep!
...I...I can't...that's just gross. I don't even know what that looks like anymore, but--
Oh, Sandshrew! D'ohhhh, sorry boy...Jess's Pokemon must have moved away from the wall, so you didn't get to play--
But you don't look upset by that, do you? Eh, oh well--
Jirachi's awake! Man, it's a good thing Soot knows Wish.
JIRACHI: Thank you--When is it?
ARTURO: Not gonna lie, it's been a couple hundred years--
JIRACHI: It has not been as long as it was supposed to be. How did they get passed here?
JESS: We were followed.
JIRACHI: Followed? But where are my guardians?
JIRACHI: Perhaps they...ran out of time.
ARTURO: So...what now?
JIRACHI: ...I've seen you two before!
JESS: Me and Tom?!
TOM: I, too, would like elaboration on this. Also, I'm sorry about the "legen-dipshit" comment.
JIRACHI: The Dream World--
TOM: Let's not talk of that place.
JESS: Why is it too early for you to wake up?
JIRACHI: Why did they attack me?
ARTURO: I dunno, they're dicks.
KEVIN: Zoroark have been roaming in packs, causing mischief around the region lately.
TOM: Whoa, what?!?! For fucking how long exactly have you known about this shit?!?
JIRACHI: This is no mere mischief--oh dear.
JESS: What is it?
JIRACHI: ...he is free.
JESS: Who's free--?
ELEKID: Oh my god! Say the name! Say the fucking name! PLEASE! Just say the name! Come on, we earned this!!
JIRACHI: You've interacted with him?!
CHANG: Please say his name to the humans. We haven't been able to communicate this to them.
JESS: What is it?
JIRACHI: I should not have been asleep, humans. Mewtwo is free.
TOM: Mewtwo?! Are you telling me Greg isn't crazy?!
ARTURO: Who the fuck is Greg?!
TOM: He always camped out right in front of Cerulean Cave, but we always assumed--
TOM: HOLY SHIT I LIVED NEXT TO THIS THING FOR LIKE TWENTY YEARS!
JESS: All those stories are true, then? About Giovanni and Red--?
ARTURO: Red's got to be fifty or something by now!
TOM: Um...ouch?
JIRACHI: There are Pokemon more powerful than human conception. I have heard of one of our kin that was kidnapped and transformed by humanity. That creature had more power and knowledge than it ever should have. It was imprisoned for its own safety, so that I could learn and understand what it was...but it is no longer imprisoned.
JESS: Why didn't Arceus stop this?
JIRACHI: Arceus is...unknown to me. To anyone, it seems. Some days, we do not know if he even exists.
JESS: You--you said that you saw us in the Dream World, right?
JIRACHI: ...yes?
JESS: And you're supposed to grant wishes, right? Do you think you could tell me where to find an Inkay?
JIRACHI: ...you think I...grant wishes?
ARTURO: Oh, you've got to be kidding me!
TOM: He doesn't grant wishes?! Ha! Oh my god, that is amazing.
JIRACHI: I suppose I have developed a reputation for aiding those who have helped me in the past.
JIRACHI: And as you have done so, I will do what I can to aid you...for we face a danger unlike the world has ever known--
GAH! IT'S SO BRIGHT! WHAT'S GOING ON--?!
Kevin! Why did you slap--wait, was Nightsun trying to evolve? And you stopped it? Why? I don't--
It's gotten dimmer...but that must mean...there are more Pokemon evolving right now--
Jess, was that your Houndour that you just sucked back into its ball?! It evolved on you--
"Not dealing with that now"? Okay, but--
Arturo! Your Gastly! It...has hands now! I suppose congratulations are in order--
Hold on...who is still evolving? There's still a bright light in the room, but--
...Elekid?!
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