Wait A Minute...

Hold on, Elekid's drying to tell me something...

I think...I think he's fought that Larvitar before.  He's been here before?

You see, Arturo? Shieldon's acting weird, too.  I think a bunch of our Pokemon were here--

Wait, what? No.  The mountains are in the absolute opposite direction of the town of Herne.  What the hell would they be doing up here, and why did they separate from the other Pokemon? Half of them returned at night and half of them returned in the morning...

...from Pelipper Rock!?!?!?

Wait...hold on...

So--my head hurts so much--let me try to understand this:

Our Pokemon found each other in the forest, and I know this because Pidgey indicated that knew where Elekid was when I asked him.  That means our Pokemon split up at some point, but into groups of too great a number to attribute the separation to an accident.  They split up intentionally, but half of them went west to the town and the other half went east up to the mountains...but why? Maybe to find where the town was? But...if that were the case, why would they have come from Pelipper Rock? They would have had to have found the town along the coast, decided not to go back, jumped into the bay, and swam to the island...but that makes no sense as to why they did that--and it's impossible! It would have taken them too long! They only took a day to get back to us, and if they travelled from Herne to the forest thanks to the tsunami, then up the mountain, back past Herne, and over to that island, we'd all still be without our Pokemon.

Unless...they managed to travel from the top of the mountain to Pelipper Rock on something that could fly.  They flew from Pelipper Rock to Herne on Pelipper, so it's not that far of a stretch...but why would they go through all this trouble?

Nothing makes any friggin' sense...

Seriously, What The Fuck?!

ELEKID:   What...the fuck...are you doing?!? You could have seriously hurt me with that shit!

LITWICK:   I'm just doing what my master told me to do.

ELEKID:   Do you understand where we are?! We are back in the fucking mountain! We're back in the mountain, and that Larvitar just crawled out of Remmington's fissure and is ready to cause some shit! I was going to kick him right in his wound and take him out before he alerted the Hariyama, but you had to step in with your bullshit pyromania!

LITWICK:   Our masters know what they're doing--

ELEKID:   No they do not! Tom barely has an idea of how to use a Poke Ball, let alone how to handle the Pokemon we've encountered in this mountain! He doesn't know what he's doing, and if your fucking behavior is any indication of your trainer's abilities, he doesn't know what the fuck he's doing either! Stay away from that Larvitar!

LITWICK:   I'm going after it.

ELEKID:   Fine! I hope Hariyama fucks a permanent hole in that brainless wax body of yours! Tom, we are in some serious shit here! I fought this Larvitar before; I'm the one who injured it.  He's a lot more dangerous than you think, and there's a lot worse out there! We know; we've been here! Arturo's Shieldon made this crack in the ground!

SHIELDON:   What's going on here, dude--?

ELEKID:   Our trainers brought us back to the fucking mountain!

SHIELDON:   ...what.

ELEKID:   Fuckin' yep! And Larvitar's back.

SHIELDON:   ...great.

ELEKID:   Litwick ran off after it, so I'm hoping on Hariyama showing up and beating the shit out of it.

SHIELDON:   ...why the fuck are we back here?

ELEKID:   Because people are stupid!!!!

Once More Into the Deep

Wow, it is dark and scary in here.  I recommend that we all stay together.  We don't want to get lost.  Say, Hitch, how do these escape ropes work? Do we tie them to a tree outside and keep the rope near us so that if we need to escape quickly, we can just follow the rope?

...excuse me?

The rope...teleports us outside? It's a rope.

I understand so little about the world today...

Hey, be careful with that pickaxe, Arturo.  You don't want to cause too much of a commotion.  What is that you're digging up, anyway?

A leaf stone? I've heard of that! That's worth something! You keep digging, I'm gonna keep an eye out for Pokemon--

Hey buddy, where are you going?!

Say, what is that?

That's a pretty deep crack.  I hear...fluttering down there.  Bats?

Nope.

Ewwgh! That...that thing doesn't look appealing at all.  Hey guys, there's a flying phallus Pokemon in a deep crack over--

Wow, I should have thought about that before I said it, but there's a Pokemon in that ditch? Anybody want it? Because I don't need it.

Really? No one? Why does nobody want any of the Pokemon I find?

Hey, that's a nice slab, Arturo--

Seriously, what's wrong with the Pokemon I point out? Are they not good? What about that one over there?

It looks powerful, but injured.  Should be easy to--

Man, that thing does not look happy.  I wonder why--

Woah, Elekid doesn't look too happy either--

Hey! Where do you think you're going? And what is that candle doing?

I don't feel safe anymore for some reason.

LOOK OUT ELEKID!!!!!

I'm Getting Better!

So, we're headed there? Doesn't seem too incredibly dangerous.  I wonder what kind of Pokemon will pop up around this area--

Ooh! Look at that! That Pokemon looks--!

And it ran away.

We didn't have to run after it the second we saw it, dude.  We could have just--

You know what? Screw it.  We don't have to argue about the Deerling.  There are plenty of other Pokemon around here.  Like...uh...

There's more Slakoth in the trees.  Does anyone want a Slakoth? I got one and...well, I don't know how he does in battle, but his claws are sharp and he seems pretty docile most of the time.  Besides, it evolves into a Slaking, and that's pretty cool.  Who wants one?

Arturo? Kevin? Anybody?

Really? Nobody wants to catch a Slakoth? Am I missing something? Is Slakoth a bad Pokemon to use in battle? I should probably test this out.

Yeah, you guys go up the mountain and chase after Pokemon at dangerous heights.  I'm gonna try out my Slakoth against something easy--

Actually, let's set a ground rule, okay? If you see a Pokemon you want, call it.  If someone calls it, nobody else throw a Poke ball at it.

Can we agree to that fucking rule, please? Can we agree on that? Great, thanks.

Asshole.

Hey...I think I see something over there.  Okay, Slakoth, time to see what you're made off--

WOAH! What the hell was that?! Wait a second...where's Slakoth?!?!

GAH! GET BACK HERE!

I don't know what that was, but if he's that ornery, I'm gonna need the big guns.  Elekid, come on out--

OH JESUS!

GET OUT HERE NOW!

Quick! Ice Punch it! Ice Punch it now!

Okay...well...that worked.  Wow, that thing is really unconscious.

And frozen.  I think it's frozen.

And almost dead.  Elekid, why don't you go check on that thing...see if you can wake it up.

You...look way too eager to do that--

IT'S AWAKE! IT'S MINE! I'M CALLING IT!

Wiggle...

...

...

...

...

...

Wiggle...

...

...

...

...

...

Yeah! I caught Gligar--!

I--I caught it.  All by myself.  On the first try.  Nobody caught it for me.  Nobody convinced the Pokemon to join my party.  I did this all on my own.

I'm...I'm getting better!

I'M GETTING BETTER!!!!!

Does anyone need help up there on the mountain? You guys seem to be having some difficulty--

Hey, Arturo, you probably shouldn't stand so close to Munchlax when he's doing Metronome.  You never know what he's going to--

This is going to end badly for everyone--

...well shit.  Are we dead? No? That was way too lucky.

But hey! I caught a Gligar! I'm getting pretty darn good at this Pokemon training thing.  Too bad you guys missed all the fun while you were up on that mountain.  Let's see what was giving you so much trouble up there.  Hmm...

You had to drop a nuke on that adorable thing, Arturo? He doesn't seem too dangerous.

And Jess, you almost fell off the mountainside trying to catch--

Well...okay, that's pretty cool, but I think Gligar is the winner out of these three.  Hey Kevin, what did you--?

Right.

I'll shut up now.

Really should have gone up the mountain.

Still got a ball left, though.  Thanks, Kevin.

Let's do this, Hitch.

Team Munchlax Assemble...Then Immediately Break Apart

Hitch does not come cheap, and now I only have $200 left.  On top of that, Kevin asks to borrow $50 in order to cover his costs, so I'm fairly destitute at the moment.  It's a good thing we had enough people to split the costs so that it isn't too expensive.  It's me, Arturo, Kevin, Umbreon-girl...and um...

This guy.  I don't know who he is, but there's just something about him that rubs me the wrong way...

But ooh! This is such a pretty place, Hitch...and so many wild Pokemon! Oh, if only I had more than just the one Poke ball.  Oh well...

Huh? Y-yes! I'll take a Poke ball as repayment! You can consider your debt absolved, Kevin!

This seems like a nice spot.  Let's see if we can catch some Pokemon.  Wild Pokemon tend to be near source of food, right? I'm gonna send out Munchlax to see if he can find anything.

Y'all sending out your Munchlaxes too? Alrighty then.  Team Munchlax has assembled.

Hey, mine found something over there in those clovers!

That...this could be a problem.  Munchlax, get back in your ball; I know who will take this guy on...

Come on out, Pidgey! The fighting has just--

Oh shit! Pidgey! Look out!

Pidgey, are you alright?

Yeah, get on up.  That this just tried to fuck you up.   What are you gonna do about it?

Pidgey...use Frustration.

Wow, that attack is powerful! Now, let's see what these Munchlax can do!

...what...what is it doing?

Okay, now it's grabbing the Pinsir by the horns...

...

...

...and he THREW THE THING OVER THE TREE LINE?!? D'awwww, I wanted to catch that Pinsir!

Sigh...

Alright, Arturo, if you want to take a look ahead to possibly find more Pokemon, go right ahead.  We got your back.  Munchlax, come back out here and see what you can find!

Hey, you're running pretty fast there, Munchlax--

And right into the river.  I'm starting to think this may not be the smartest--

Hey, that's a Pokemon egg! Great find, Munchlax! We can hold onto that and when it hatches, I can--

NO! DON'T EAT IT!!!!

Gaaaaaah...fuck.  I wonder what Pokemon it was going to be--

AHH! I think I know now what Pokemon it was going to be, and those Pokemon do not look pleasant! Munchlax, you may want to try this Metronome move for yourself.

Okay, now pick it up and throw it over--

Or, just drop into that weird stance.  That's fine.  The other Munchlaxes tried this move and one disappeared, one started strutting, and the other just made a weird face.  Say, what's going on over there?

Arturo, you okay over there? What are you fighting?

Aww, he's cute! He doesn't look very--

Oh shit! Do you need help? No? Alright...your call--

Munchlax?

WOAH JESUS! Way to slam into that lobster and knock it into next week! You might be one of the stronger of the Munchlax--

And that one just picked up a tree and slammed the other lobster.  Never mind, you got lucky...but lucky is good.

I wonder how Arturo is fairing--

ARTURO! PINSIR'S BACK AND HE IS COMING TO KILL YOU! SHIT! SHIT! PIDGEY!

Pidgey! Pinsir's back! Fuck him up!

Oh...you know what to do.

Yeah! Good hit--!

Crap! The thing has one of the Munchlaxes in its claw-mouth-thing! Hit him again!

...

...

...PINSIR IS DOWN! Alright! Poke ball, go--!

Wait! Does anyone mind if I catch this? Nobody else want it? No? Cool!

Poke ball, go!

...

...

...

Wait, why the hell isn't the ball trying to catch the Pinsir? I though--

What's that, Kev?

Oh...you have to just barely knock it out? That seems like bullshit.  Alright...is this thing gonna wake up soon? It will? Great.  I'm waiting with ball in hand.

...

...

...

...

Nope, I don't care about the Corphish.  Munchlax, return! My eyes are on Pinsir.

Hey, Arturo, are you still fighting that Poliwag? It escaped? Okay.  Don't need to worry about that.  Just gotta worry about--

...wh-what? What happ--?

WHO THREW THAT?!?!?! WHO THE HELL THREW THAT?!?!?!

What the fuck, guy?! I asked if anyone wanted it and you didn't say a fucking thing! What right do you have to catch that Pinsir?

No, you were not saving my life! I was nowhere near the pincers! I don't care if it regained consciousness and was just focusing its energy; if you have time to throw an Ultra ball, you have time to yell, "Tom, throw the ball now!"

Oh, you didn't even want the Pinsir?! You were just going to give it to me?!

Alright.  Let me explain something to you right now: I don't need hand-me-outs, and I sure as shit don't need people catching my Pokemon for me! Kevin gave me a Poke ball because he owed me money and I accepted the trade, but this? Where do you get off?!

So now you want to keep it?! I'll tell you what: my Pidgey worked its ass off to take that Pinsir out.  If you want it...

YOU FUCKING WORK FOR IT! HUH?! HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT, MR. GOOD SAMARITAN?! WHY DON'T YOU SEND YOUR MUNCHLAXES INTO THAT CORPHISH RIVER AND--

Why is Azurill out? Where is he--?

Oh, so now you want it?! Where the hell were you during that battle--?!

Wait a minute...are you telling me that's your Ultra ball, but you lost it in the tidal wave?

What kind of cluster-fuck is this?!?! I don't even--

Wait...

Wait...that's it.

Alright, so Pidgey and I did nearly all of the work taking this Pinsir out, so I have a claim to this Pokemon.  Mr. Black over here threw the ball that caught the Pinsir, so he's got a claim to this Pokemon.  However, the ball he used belonged to Kev, so he has a claim to this Pinsir.  Yet, in the end, it was Arturo who retrieved the ball and saved Pinsir from being lost down-river, so he's got an equal claim to it.

I'll tell you what: we'll battle for it.  Winner takes all.  Agreed?

Arturo, you don't really want it? Fine, you can referee the match.  Hitch, hold onto this ball for us.  We'll deal with this back in town.  Right now, we have a mine to investigate.

Let's fucking go already.