Here we are. folks! The grudge-match of the year! Kevin Adams, the tall, dark and secretive jack-of-all-trades from Unova defends his right to be the shadowy deus-ex-machina of our group against Arturo Stone, son of the intrepid president of the Devon Corporation and brother of the Hoenn League Champion, Steven Stone! I'm Tom Cedar, reporting live from the Bed of Jirachi deep in the sunny Ombos Desert, and joining me on the commentary rock is my Slakoth. Slakoth! Any thoughts about the upcoming battle?
An interesting perspective, as always, Slakoth. There have been no discussions as to how many Pokemon are going to be used for this battle, but one thing is certain: this is going to be an all-out last-man-standing match!
Our competitors look ready to begin, so let's get this battle underway!
And trainers have called out their first Pokemon. Arturo leads with his Gastly, Shadow, while on the other side of the field, Kevin has elected to start off with Juanita the Corphish! An interesting match, to be sure!
ARTURO: Enough with the subtleties. You know what to do!
And Shadow starts off by trying to put Juanita to sleep with Hypnosis--
But Juanita shakes off the drowsy feelings and begins to bury deep into the sand. Arturo's bound to have some difficulty dealing any kind of damage to Juanita while she's beneath the earth--
It looks like Arturo is commanding Shadow to phase through the ground and pursue Juanita! Interesting plan, since Ghost-type Pokemon are incorporeal and can pass through solid matter!
It's difficult to say who's winning at this point; it could be anybody's battle here, folks--
And Juanita bursts from the ground, blasting through a cloud of purple dust! That cloud must be what's left of Shadow after that Dig attack made contact! A poor tactic from Arturo, in retrospect: Shadow's levitation would have made it immune to any Ground-type attacks from Juanita, but phasing into the earth after her made him a prime target, and of course, being a Poison-type as well as a Ghost-type, Shadow took massive damage from Juanita's attack. And I should know, that lobster packs a wallop!
Kevin retains all of his Pokemon without sustaining damage from a single attack, and Arturo is already down to five! It looks like both trainers are prepping for a clean swap, so brand new Pokemon will be hitting the field shortly. Slakoth, is this a particularly wise move for Kevin at this point in the battle?
Right you are, Slakoth--
It would seem that Kevin has elected to switch into Chang the Meditite, while--whoa ho! Arturo is returning to the battlefield with the newly-evolved Ignacio, the one-ton slot machine! Chang has a definitive offensive type advantage, but can it pack enough of a punch to bring down the mighty Snorlax? With that Metronome attack Arturo is so fond of using, he may yet cinch a victory here today...if the fates are on his side of course.
Chang is clearly the faster of the two, and he begins the bout by generating an orb of silvery light--that he launches it all directions to make sure he hits Ignacio wherever he might dodge--
SHIT! Okay! Let's not take out the commentators, okay, Billy Badass?
Ah ha! A brilliant move by Arturo! The lumbering Ignacio ran straight up to Chang and gave him a big lick right across the face! Lick is going to be super-effective against the Psychic-type Chang and--
Chang seems to be suffering from paralysis, a possible side effect of the Lick attack! The stars seem to be aligning for our young archaeologist. Now, with Chang slowed, Arturo is free to command Ignacio for a second attack--
It seems to have selected a move...let's see--
POW! A debilitating Head Smash from Ignacio! Throwing his whole body behind that attack, Chang is now pinned underneath the Snorlax! That's no easy squeeze to escape from, let me tell you!
Chang has just managed to escape from underneath the mighty Ignacio, but this leaves him wide open to--
Yes! Another Metronome! Ignacio's been known to cause some serious damage with this move, summoning the powers of attacks few people have ever even seen before--
And here comes the attack! His body is crackling with...blue electricity? Could this be an Electric-type attack--?
HOLY SHIT! I've never seen an Electric-type attack like that one before! A massive blue bolt of lightning struck Chang directly at center of mass--and Chang goes down hard! He's not knocked out, but Kevin is recalling Chang...and Ignacio is beaming with as much confidence as his trainer is.
And out comes Dee the Skarmory! Ignacio is going to have a lot of trouble dealing damage to this hardy bird, but remember that Dee suffered some serious injuries when she fought the Golurk. Will she be up for a battle so soon after?
It's a standoff between the two Pokemon! Dee outclasses Ignacio in speed, but Kevin seems to be taunting Arturo to make the first move!
Ignacio goes up for the Metronome...the fingers are wiggling...and--
Ignacio falls backward and goes directly to sleep! Rest will heal up Ignacio from any damage he's taken, but that will leave him wide open for Dee to ravage him with attack after attack--
And there goes Dee like an agile comet! With that speed and agility, Dee will surely make short work of Ignacio! Talons and pecks are flying and Ignacio is just sleeping through it all--wait...
Ignacio is waking up! Just a quick Rest and the Snorlax is ready to go again!
The Metronome is charging...and here comes the new attack--
FIRE! Fire bursting from the ground in circular shock waves! That had to have done serious damage to the Steel-type Dee--
But the bird is still flying! It's difficult to take that queen of the sky down--!
It seems as though Ignacio is egging Dee on to make a direct attack! I don't know if that's a wise move, considering--
Too late! Dee takes off like a torpedo, straight into the chest of the giant Snorlax like an avian bullet--and Ignacio falls unconscious! Bravado is not the way to win a match, folks, and I think Arturo's going to need to learn that if he plans on beating Kevin today, he can't turn this into a pissing contest--
I don't believe it! Arturo slips Ignacio a Revive and the Snorlax is back up, staring directly at the fierce Skarmory!
KEVIN: Are we done?
JESS: Arturo, don't do anything stupid.
ARTURO: This is far from over!
What is this? He is calling back Ignacio after freshly reviving him, but who--?
It's Anubis! Arturo is calling out his Lucario Anubis to take down the mighty Dee! We need to be careful here, folks. The last time these two trainers dueled Steel-against-Steel, the town of Herne was nearly obliterated. Now, instead of the Shieldon Remington, Arturo's elected a far-more powerful opponent for Dee!
Dee strikes first by unleash a volley of Swift stars at Anubis--
But Anubis is undeterred from completing his Swords Dance as he races towards the shimmering Skarmory--!
And Dee takes off, directly towards Anubis with her beak reared for a mighty Peck--and she attempts to pick Anubis up into the air with her mouth!
Ever prepared, Anubis delivers a powerful kick to the side of the Skarmory and releases the bird's beaky grip on him--
And he sticks the landing! I'd give that a 9.5 out of 10! Slakoth, how about you?
SLAKOTH: Well...Kevin and Arturo are both good...so I guess we'll have to see what Pokemon they choose for the battle--
ARTURO: End it! Just end it!
And with that swift command, Anubis leaps into the air and collides with the Skarmory in a mighty Force Palm strike! Anubis is certainly playing for keeps with this battle!
Dee folds his wings in, recovering from the blow, and charges directly at Anubis on foot! This is truly unexpected--!
The blows between the two Pokemon are coming so fast that I can barely keep up! The constant clash of metal against metal is echoing throughout the dunes--and it looks as though the attacks have stopped!
Both Pokemon are still standing, though! This is an incredible match, to be sure--!
ARTURO: Anubis! I said end it! What are you doing?!
Woah...okay there, Arturo, let's not get carried away here. We're all friends here--
ARTURO: You're useless!! I don't need you to finish this fight!
Dude! Chill out, okay? Anubis is doing great; you don't have to call him back just because--
He...he caught his own ball?! Arturo, man, you better apologize--
Shit! Arturo, are you alright?! I wasn't expecting Anubis to throw the ball directly into you--
Come on, man! There's no need to yell at your Pokemon like that! Come on, you're upsetting us and our Pokemon--
Arturo! You're not gonna fix this by just calling Anubis back in his ball--
ANUBIS! You...you broke your own ball!! Arturo, man, this isn't--
ARTURO!!!! Dude, I knew you went to far yelling at Anubis like that--
Kevin, Anubis seems to be...giving you a Hyper Potion and a Revive? I guess it's a respect thing for the battle--
ARTURO: WHAT ARE YOU DOING??!?
Arturo, you're just not gonna learn, are you?
Well, it looks like Anubis just snatched your survival bag and ran headlong into the temple. Now, the only thing you've got left are your five other Pokemon and a black eye--
Good idea, Sylvester. Give Anubis some space. We're gonna need to go in after him, but we need to let him have some time to cool down first.
SLAKOTH: I mean, I don't know if switch Juanita out right now is a good idea--wow, that Snorlax is giving off a lot of blue light--that's a whole lot of fire--my home burned down!
SLAKOTH: Why didn't I remember that until just now? I just--boy, Anubis looks mad! He was just as mad as that voice sounded on that island--Mewtwo was that mad! He hates people--I REMEMBER MEWTWO! OH NO! OH NO! OH NO! I GOTTA TELL TOM! I GOTTA TELL EVERYONE!!!
SLAKOTH: My heart's beating really fast...--
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