Don't Look It In The Butt!

You know, I think we're becoming regulars at this Pokemon Center, you guys.  Maybe...maybe we should all be a little bit more careful when going out there in search of Pokemon adventures or what-have-you.

You especially, Erik.  I mean, I'm not one to tell people how to live their lives...but you're in a wheelchair and pretty heavily concussed.  But hey, we did it; we took out the Vespiquen.

I'm not saying that working as a team with the entirety of this particular group is something I want to make frequent, but we did what we could--

Erik, what are you talking about now? "Accomplice"--?

Oh lord, here we go again with this.  Look, I don't think this is a good pursuit of--

Well, I mean yeah, he filed a false police report, but that doesn't--

Yeah, as sad as it is, I gotta agree with Josh on this one; that charge has nothing to do with you claiming him as your accomplice--

The...the cop didn't make it? I'm sorry.  Hell, Chloris has zero police presence right now.   This could be a very dangerous situation--

No, Erik, I don't think this has anything to do with the floating pink orb Pokemon that allegedly melded with your mind and showed you all of creation.  I'm just...

Jess, I'm gonna step out for a minute.  There are only so many hours of nighttime left and Gligar is on a clock.

It is really beautiful out, though.  Well, let's get to work! Chinchou and Gligar: come on out and stay on the alert.

Where the hell are all the wild Pokemon? There should be wild Pokemon drawn to the light off of Chinchou's head-dangles, but there's nothing.  If only I had some honey--

Wait, maybe Snorlax still has some on his claws!

Ah ha! Jackpot! Now, I just have to rub some of this off on a nearby tree, and Pokemon should be drawn by sight and by scent to my location--

There's one! Gligar, go get it!

Well, that was pretty easy.  I doubt that was enough to incite an evolution, but we'll keep on at it--

You see something else, girl? What is it?

Wow, yeah, what is that? Pokedex, lemme see what you got on this thing.  In the meantime...Gligar, go get it!

Alright, lemme see...Volbeat? What's a Volbeat?

Ah, so that's a Volbeat.  Okay Gligar, don't look directly at it's butt or it'll end up flashing you into blindness.  Just keep on at it--

There's another one? I don't know if Gligar can handle all that.  Pidgey, come on out and lend a hand!

Keep up a steady gust--

DON'T LOOK IT IN THE BUTT! D'ah, Pidgey! It's okay, shake it off--

Another one?! Holy hell, this might be a bit too much! Chinchou, fill the air with bubbles and try to hit one of them, if not all--

Chinchou! You were here the whole time! What did I say about looking at it in the butt?!

A fourth?!?! Guys, we're in way over our head here! Pidgey! Give a swift gust aimed at all of them! Give it a try--

They're...they're all flipping in the exact same way?

They're illusions! That Volbeat is using Double-Team! Oh, you tricksy little insect! Okay guys, take five.  I know how to handle this; if I can't find a way to hit the right one of you, I'll find a way to hit all of you!

SNORLAX!

Use Metronome!

You better get ready for a world of hurt, Volbeat! I've seen nuclear explosions come out of a Metronome, so just--

I'm...I'm not certain what that's doing...but it's gonna make his next Metronome that much stronger!

I hope...

Snorlax! Give me one more Metronome!

WOAH! HOLY SHIT! That thing moved fast! Did...did you just use Quick Attack?! Well, that sure did the trick--

Wait, where did you go?

*THUD*

Were you...did you end up in that tree?! Holy hell, we need to be careful about using this move--

Jess! Hey...HEY! Did you see my Snorlax in a friggin' tree?! It's not every day you see...

Oh...hey, I mean, you're welcome.  I just thought it'd be a shame if you ended up in jail for socking Erik in the head, so...I mean, trainers gotta look out for each other sometimes, y'know? It's hard enough out here on our own, so a wise word or a kindness here and there really goes a long way--

Who's this? I think he likes you.  See? He's all happy and musical and glowy--

Oh, holy crap! Your Pokedex says that thing is a Kricketune? Say, maybe you should catch that thing.  Bug-types are strong against Dark-types and this fella might help you down the line with catching more Dark-type Pokemon.

Oh, you say the thing wants to be with its own kind...and mate with all the sweet Kricketot ladies? That's...cute? I mean, yeah, that's probably what it wants, so...yeah, but y'know, you might want to keep that Bug-type thing in mind for the future.  You go get some rest.  I'm gonna stay up a little while longer and try to not think of bug sex every time I hear that thing go DEEDLEEDLEEDLEEDLEE WOOOOOOOP.

Well, there's a little park-like area over there.  Maybe we should check that out--

OWWW! HOLY SHIT! What the hell just hit me?!

Some shadowy-ass little hairball, huh? Gligar, go get--!

Gligar? Gligar, where did you get to now?! GLIGAR!

There you are! You found something? Well, I found something, too, and we need to ruin it's whole friggin' day because it punched me in the face!

Also, Elekid, you may want to come out and illuminate the surroundings a little bit more.  I really don't feel like getting sucker-punched again.

There it went! It's heading across that bridge! Well...under it...off the side of it--

LET'S GET THAT THING--!

No police presence in all of Chloris and this beat-cop is standing guard over the one place I want to get.  Great.

No, officer, I'm not trying to get over the bridge...it's just that there was this sucker-punching little Pokemon that clocked me in the mouth and ran off in this direction--

No, it didn't get past you, but it did go across the bridge on the underside.  That's what my Pokemon are looking for--

Electrical problems? Well, if there are electrical problems keeping the bridge shut down, I'm an electrical engineer and can probably fix that.  If you'll just let me cross--

In the morning.  Okay.  Fine by me.  Just...keep your flashlight on.

Now, Gligar...where did you say you found something? Take me there.

Woah, that thing looks pissed! Keep your distance--!

Oh...it can't move.  Well then...I guess Poison Sting it!

It doesn't seem to be doing much damage.  Maybe the thing has a really thick skin--

GLIGAR LOOK OUT!

What the hell just hit you on the head?

Oh, it's another one of those things--!

Wait...no, this one's different somehow...

So this is a Silcoon, and the other one is a Cascoon.  Interesting.  They seem to evolve from the same Pokemon...and they're Bug-types! Jess could use one of these! But...how to defeat them--

I know! If they like dropping on heads, what if we dropped them on their heads! Gligar! Pick that one up, get as high as you can, then dive-bomb that thing into the pavement!

Okay, it's a little heavy.  Pidgey, give a little breeze up there to help her out.

That's what I'm talking about! Teamwork!

*CRACK* There goes one, and *CRACK* there goes the other! Way to go Gligar--!

What's wrong? You're...you're not evolving? Let's see here...

Well, I could've sworn that this is the right fang...lemme just check the Pokedex--

Oh.

So this is the right fang.  Darn.  It looks like you're not evolving tonight, Gligar.

Hey now, you did great tonight! You got a lot stronger, and I bet you needed a confidence boost before we head over to the gym in the morning, so I'm proud of you, regardless of whether or not you evolved.  Actually, that gives me an idea...

Everybody, come on out for a minute!

Okay guys...we've had a long couple of days together recently, but tomorrow's going to get a little intense.  For those of you who don't know what a gym battle is...which is probably all of you...it's our first step towards becoming a stronger team.  We beat Tara and her Ground-types tomorrow and we officially start our journey as an official team.  By the way, if someone wants to relay this to Pinsir when I get her out of the computer, that would be super.

Anyway, Tara uses Ground-types, so we're at a bit of a disadvantage, since Chinchou is the only one with a type-advantage, but even still, Ground-type attacks will probably still hurt a lot...but we also have a lot of advantages she won't see coming.  She'll never expect an Elekid with Ice Punch, and Metronome is always a crap-shoot--

Actually, you're probably going to get the day off tomorrow, Snorlax.

You don't seem too disappointed.  Good.

Slakoth, you might not have a whole lot of strength yet, but I bet you there's little that big ole' Steelix of hers can do if you put it to sleep! And Pidgey, Gligar...you're Flying-types, so you won't even be affected by her Ground-type attacks.  Elekid, I'm going to let you hold onto that balloon so you get the same benefits.  I want everyone to rest up real well, because if and when I call you out tomorrow, I want you to come out swinging.  We ready? GO TEAM CEDAR!

Now, let's get to bed...but first...

I'm gonna leave a little wake-up present for Jess.  Maybe one of these will strike her fancy.

Alright, now to find my bed--

A note? From Erik? Okay...

Yeah, I'm an electrician.  Elecrical engineer, really...mostly maintenance of generators and such, why?

A business venture? Gee, I dunno...

Fixing broken Poke Balls? I mean, I might be able to.  I'd have to take a look at it first--

And "streamlining" the Pokedex? That sounds pretty over my head, but I guess I could try.  As for a partnership, anything we do, we're gonna be legal about it.  We'll go over more terms in the morning, but right now, I'll take a gander at your Pokedex while I heal my Pokemon.

Say...you know what? This thing doesn't look too complicated after all! I think I can jailbreak this thing! Of course, I'll have to try anything on my own first.

Here's your Dex back, Erik.  It's within my power to work with it.  But right now, I need to sleep--

Referee a match between you and Josh?!?! Look, I'm not what you would call "impartial" in that sense, but if I'm up, I'll stop by and see it if I can watch it at noon before heading over to the gym.  But right now, I really need to rest.

Big day, tomorrow...lordy.