I Would Like To Express My Sincerest Apologies

I...well...I certainly wasn't expecting this.  Cliff walls...inside the gym?

And rapids...inside the gym? Who in the hell builds these gyms? Is there a school of architectural design somewhere in the other regions that teaches how to build this crap? Also, aren't there some kind of safety regulations in place so that people don't die in these gyms?

There seems to be a central plateau towards the top of these cliffs...that's got to be where Tyre is.  If I can only get up there.

Jim, is this gym going to fuck me up?

Yep.  Thought so.  Throw me a water and let's do this thing.

So, Tyre tests himself and his apprentices in harsh environments, and he expects us to face the same.  I'm still not convinced that the trainers are going to do more damage than this terrain.

Well, I have to start up the west side of the gym to get any higher, so...here we go.

I had really hoped that I wouldn't need to be climbing another steep cliff-face in the near future, but hey, at least I wouldn't have to deal with any Pokemon looming in the shadows above me waiting for--

What the hell is--?

FIST! EMERGENCY DIVE ROLL!

What the--? Hey, don't I know you? Yeah...you were one of the apprentices from inside Tyre's house. It doesn't really look as though Tyre's giving you guys much of a chance to rest up after that ordeal.  Well...let's get on with it then.  Go, Chinchou!

Show me what you're packing there, grasshopper--

A Mankey.  That thing does not look--

Why is it inhaling--? Oh god, plug the ears--!

GAH IT'S HORRIBLE! CHINCHOU! REMEMBER THE CENTIPEDE! THUNDER WAVE!

Now! Before it brushes off the static! Confuse Ray!

Okay! We've gotten it into a cycle of self-abuse.  Let's tag you out.  Now, Pidgeotto, come on out!

The Mankey can barely get to its feet! Gust!

Yeah! The wind packs a wallop! You got that thing rolling--

Right off the cliff OH DEAR GOD!

I...I AM SO SORRY! Can you recall it?

The rapids are too strong! Your Mankey is getting sucked down towards that opening by the entry--

THAT LEADS TO THE WATERFALL! SHIT! SHIT! SHIT--!

...I, once again, would like to express my sincerest apologies for what happened just then.  I had no idea--

Oh...so that's why there are cliffs and rapids? So that you guys can knock our Pokemon down there on purpose?!

Not gonna lie, that's kind of dangerous...and dickish.  But, uh, did you want to go get your Mankey--?

After the battle? Alright, it's your monkey.

Okay, I'm going to assume this little log-lugger is another Fighting-type.  Pidgeotto, give him a Gust...but...please, aim in, away from the rapids?

POW! Knocked him right back into his trainer! Let's see what this bugger's got left in him after taking a hit like that--

Did he just break the stone ground with his log? If he gan pick up those shards...

ROCK THROW! PIDGEOTTO, LOOK OUT--!

Damn! Out cold.  Alright, bird-o, take five.  Let's send out someone who can take a few stones to the face.  Nidorino, go--

That sounded bad.  Nidorino, go!

Peck him right between the eyes! He's gonna learn he's gonna need to bring his A-game against you!

That's what I'm talking about! Get ready, Nidorino, it looks like batter's up--!

Okay, shake it off! Peck him in the arm! Weaken that swing of his!

There we go! Let's see him throw that thing around now--

So he's resorted to slapping, eh? Nidorino, pin that hand of his to the wall and show him how you slap.

One horn in the hand and two feet across the face.  That's how we do.

Thank you for the $600, friend.  Go attend to your Mankey.  I don't think anyone's coming to challenge Tyre after me...at least as far as I know.

I know it's only going to get harder from here.  I better heal up the entire team before I take on anyone else.  Back to the Pokemon Center.

Geez, if that's what the first apprentice was like, Tyre's got to be much stronger.  No wonder everyone so far has had such difficulty with him.

Hey, Jess.  Round one was successful.  I haven't lost yet, but hey, the night's still young.  Just dropping by to heal up the team before taking on anyone else.  I'll...probably be doing that a lot--

Well, that sounds like my cue to pick up the team.  Looks like I'm off.

...oh, and if you happen to see any of my Pokemon shoot out of that waterfall...do try to grab them up before they drown, if you can.

Or me.  If you see me shoot out of the waterfall, don't let me drown...

'Kay, thanks.  Bye!